Therapy for Children & Teens

Children and teens don’t always tell us what is going on with words.

Sometimes anxiety looks like irritability. Feeling overwhelmed may look like refusing to do something, shutting down, getting angry, or avoiding situations altogether. A child who is struggling socially may come home and fall apart after holding it together all day. A teenager may insist that everything is “fine” while parents can clearly see that something has changed.

Part of my work is helping families understand what may be happening underneath the behavior.

I work with children and teens experiencing anxiety, emotional regulation difficulties, social challenges, school stress, life transitions, family changes, and other emotional or behavioral concerns. My approach is individualized because two children with the same concern may need very different things from therapy.

Meeting Children Where They Are

I don’t expect a child to come into my office, sit down, and talk about their feelings for 45 minutes.

Children often communicate and learn through doing. Depending on the child’s age and personality, sessions may include games, activities, visuals, worksheets, drawing, stories, movement, or structured CBT exercises alongside conversation.

These activities aren’t simply a way to make therapy fun. They give me opportunities to understand how a child thinks, responds to frustration, solves problems, handles uncertainty, communicates, and relates to another person.

They also give children a way to learn skills by experiencing and practicing them rather than simply being told what they should do.

With one child, we may practice recognizing the difference between a worried thought and a fact. With another, we might work on noticing what happens in their body when they become angry. Another child may need help tolerating frustration, thinking more flexibly, navigating friendships, or learning what to do when something doesn’t go the way they expected.

The goal is to make therapy understandable and useful to the particular child sitting in front of me.

Helping Kids Understand Themselves

One of the things I want children to gain from therapy is a better understanding of themselves.

Instead of simply thinking, “Something is wrong with me,” a child can begin to recognize, “This is what happens when I get anxious,” or “I have a hard time thinking when I’m really frustrated.”

Once children understand what is happening, we can give them tools for what to do next.

We might practice calming strategies, flexible thinking, problem-solving, coping with uncomfortable feelings, identifying unhelpful thoughts, asking for help, or handling a difficult situation differently.

I also want children to recognize their strengths. When a child is having difficulty at home or school, adults can understandably become very focused on what needs to change. Therapy should also be a place where children experience themselves as capable, interesting, and much more than the problem that brought them into my office.

Working With Teens

Therapy with teenagers looks different.

Adolescence comes with its own challenges—friendships, school pressure, changing family relationships, increasing independence, identity, expectations, and decisions about the future. Teens may be dealing with anxiety or emotional struggles while also trying to figure out who they are and how much they want their parents involved in their lives.

I work to create a space where teens can speak honestly without feeling judged, lectured, or immediately told what to do.

At the same time, therapy is not just a place to talk. We look at patterns together. What are you telling yourself about this situation? What happens when you avoid something because you are anxious? What parts of this problem can you control? What can’t you control? What would it look like to handle this situation in a way that feels more consistent with the person you want to be?

Sometimes teens need concrete coping tools. Sometimes they need help looking at a situation differently. And sometimes they need a safe place to sort through complicated feelings before deciding what they want to do.

Looking Beyond the Behavior

Behavior is important, but I am also interested in what is driving it.

A child who refuses to do something may be oppositional—or the task may feel overwhelming. A teenager who procrastinates may need better structure, or anxiety and perfectionism may be making it difficult to begin. A child who repeatedly leaves a situation may need a firmer expectation, better coping skills, or both.

Understanding the reason behind a behavior helps us decide how to respond.

Understanding does not mean removing every expectation or uncomfortable feeling. Children also need opportunities to discover that they can do hard things.

Part of therapy is finding that balance: What support does this child genuinely need, and what can this child learn to handle?

Parents Are Part of the Picture

When I work with children and teens, I also recognize that they are part of a family.

When appropriate, I collaborate with parents to help them understand what their child is working on and how they can reinforce those skills at home. Sometimes a parent meeting is helpful to discuss patterns, expectations, boundaries, or ways of responding to a child’s anxiety or behavior.

The amount of parent involvement depends on the child’s age, needs, and circumstances. As children get older, privacy becomes increasingly important to the therapeutic relationship. I work to maintain an appropriate balance between giving a young person a space that feels like their own and involving parents when it is clinically helpful or necessary.

When useful, I may also collaborate with other professionals involved in a child’s care so that everyone has a clearer understanding of the child’s needs.

Building Confidence Beyond Therapy

Ultimately, I don’t want children to believe that they can handle difficult things only when a therapist is there to help them.

I want them to begin recognizing their own patterns, remembering the tools that work for them, and experiencing themselves successfully getting through situations that once felt overwhelming.

That might mean a child realizing, “I’m nervous, but I can still do it.”

It might mean a teenager noticing a worst-case thought and being able to question it before believing it.

It might mean tolerating disappointment without falling apart, handling a friendship differently, staying in a difficult situation a little longer, or simply becoming more comfortable saying, “This is hard for me, and I need help.”

Those experiences build confidence.

My goal is not to eliminate every uncomfortable feeling or make childhood and adolescence problem-free. It is to help children and teens better understand themselves, develop practical skills, and become increasingly confident in their ability to manage the challenges that come their way.

You’re welcome to reach out to learn more about therapy for children and teens or to schedule a consultation.